


Those hands

by LunaNocis



Category: VIXX
Genre: A little bit of angst, Fluff, M/M, Platonic Relationships, first attempt at leobin, what to tag?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-08
Updated: 2017-09-08
Packaged: 2018-12-25 09:16:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,304
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12032844
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LunaNocis/pseuds/LunaNocis
Summary: Based off an AU I read on twitter, in which Taekwoon loves Binnie's tiny hands (don't we all?) Thanks to @DeerEyedHongbin for letting me use it! <3





	Those hands

**Author's Note:**

> I was experiencing a severe writer block when these days, and this story has really helped me a whole lot! Hopefully it turned out nice enough, and you'll like it. I'll try to get back to my other writing as soon as I can, too! I'm feeling all fired up now <3

From all the things that could be considered comforting, for Jung Taekwoon, it was those hands. Strong, soft, reliable and always so gentle. Exactly like their owner.

It starts at a young age. Taekwoon doesn’t quite enjoy playing with the other kids, so he sits alone, eating his food quietly. He doesn’t feel lonely, though; he has his notebook with him. His fingers tap distractedly on his legs as he reads the piano sheet in front of him.

“What is this?” says a voice. It sounds younger than him. Taekwoon doesn’t lift his face from the notebook, so he only sees the tiny hand pointing at it. “Can I see it?”

Taekwoon is about to say no. He’s never showed his sheets to anyone; not even Hakyeon. But then he looks up. The kid seems about three years younger than him; his eyes spark with genuine curiosity, and before the older can tell himself otherwise, he’s handling his most precious possession. To a stranger.

The kid sits in front of him, holding the notebook carefully as he scans the pages with a look of concentration on his round face. It makes Taekwoon nervous. Self-conscious. What is he staring at?

Suddenly, the bell rings. The kid gives him back the notebook, smiling brightly. “This is so cool! Did you write those?” Taekwoon doesn’t know what to say. He nods. “Can I come again tomorrow?” “Uh… Sure?” Someone calls the kid from behind. “See you tomorrow, hyung!” The kid scatters away, towards the primary school building.

Taekwoon is still sitting when Hakyeon finds him. Taekwoon tries to explain why is he still there, eyes fixed on the building into which that strange kid disappeared. But he can’t.

_I don’t even know his name._

-·-·-·-·-·-

Time goes by, and Lee Hongbin becomes a constant in Taekwoon’s life. The boy doesn’t know how he manages to do it, but the kid escapes his teachers’ vigilance every day. Just to spend lunch watching him scribble on his notebook.

But not just that. Hongbin talks a lot. Taekwoon doesn’t respond much, but it doesn’t seem like the other expects, or needs him to. You’d think the older would find it annoying; nothing further from the truth. The way Hongbin flings his arms around while talking about pretty much anything that comes to his mind is so endearing. His gestures are expressive and come to him so naturally… And almost without noticing, Taekwoon learns about him, his friends, family, tastes, habits…

Hongbin also asks a lot. Every new topic brings up a new question: Does Taekwoon have a pet? What is his favourite ice cream flavour? What are his thoughts on rainy nights? And his hobbies? That, particularly, seems to have picked his interest the most. Has Taekwoon written all this sheets? Which instruments does he play? Is it difficult? Does he like it? The boy stops to consider it. Does he enjoy his lessons? The music? “I… think so?” The boy smiles, “Do you?” And so, little by little, Hongbin learn things about Taekwoon, his family, friends, tastes, habits…

It’s so easy, so comfortable, and Taekwoon wouldn’t trade it for the world.

~·~·~·~·~·~

Taekwoon has become busier. Now that he’s in high school, he spends most of his free time in the library, studying. Hongbin says it’s okay. Studies should go first. But he misses the younger boy’s friendly chatter. His endless questions. The way his hands dance in the air when he speaks, and his hold on his arm when he leans closer to look at his notebook.

Taekwoon misses Hongbin.

“Can’t you see him at any other moment?” Hakyeon asks when he catches his friend staring outside the window for the hundredth time since they started working, and the boy can’t believe it hasn’t occurred to him earlier. Of course he can. Hongbin has mentioned so many times where he lives, and it’s relatively close to his own home. He gets up and leaves, work forgotten. Only five minutes before the lunch break finishes.

He runs out of the building, and he’s about to go to the same place where he always meets with the boy when a doubt assaults him: Where does Hongbin go when they’re not meeting? He’s never asked… He goes then towards the middle school building; hopefully, he can see him before he goes back…

There he was. He was talking to another boy, taller than him. Hongbin hangs from his arm, jokingly pulling him away from the school building, and they laugh. Taekwoon doubts one second too long and stops. _Come on Taek…_ He takes a deep breath.

“H-Hongbin…!” he half shouts; he doesn’t usually raise his voice so much and it feels foreigner to his ears. The brunette looks around, confused, until he sees him. And when he does, his whole face lits up. He says something to his tall friend and runs up to Taekwoon, who soon sees himself warped in his arms; he’s growing up strong, but his hands still feel tiny holding onto the back of his sweater. His face heats up.

“Taekwoon-hyung!” he pulls away and looks at him curiously. “Weren’t you studying? What happened?” “I… I thought that” he starts, slowly. “Since we can’t see each other much lately, if you want… Maybe we can go back home together?” Taekwoon is sure it’s impossible to smile brighter than the boy does right now. “Sure! I need to go, see you later!”

Hongbin turns to wave him goodbye as he runs towards the building, and it makes Taekwoon’s insides do the thing. That twisting. And he’s happy.

-·-·-·-·-·-

Taekwoon steps out of the high school building and starts walking around the precincts. Even though the high school is technically a separate school from the primary and middle ones, all the three share the same space. Somewhere in that huge place, Hongbin must be finishing his club activities.

He walks behind the gym, at the back of the school’s perimeter, and there he is; Hongbin’s sitting in front of the flower field from the botanic club; tiny flowers are starting to bloom. Taekwoon is about to call him when the boy turns and snaps a picture. Taekwoon looks over his shoulder as he scrolls through the camera roll.

There are many pretty pictures; mostly from the sky, the trees… Some are from his friends and classmates; Taekwoon thinks he’s recognised Hongbin’s tall friend in a couple of them. But he isn’t sure, the images go by too fast. Then there’s his picture.

Hongbin smiles. “It’s good, right?” Taekwoon doesn’t know what’s good about it, but he doesn’t say anything. He thinks it looks kind of dark, with his black hair and black jacket (all dressed in black, as always); his skin is so pale in contrast. He also has a weird, startled expression. “You’re good at this.” He says instead, because it’s true.

~·~·~·~·~·~

Taekwoon has been out of reach for a couple of days. This isn’t strange to Hakyeon, who knows him since before he can remember. He texts him before leaving with his family for the weekend. He wants to visit him too, but he knows the time isn’t right just yet.

Hongbin, who even only recently started seeing him outside of school, doesn’t know. When the boy first misses school, he thinks he might be sick. It wouldn’t be strange. He sends him a text wishing him to get well soon. Two days later, Taekwoon has yet to even read the message; he starts worrying. Maybe something is wrong?

“You know where he lives, right?” Wonsik takes a piece of his tangerine, but the other is engulfed in his thoughts and doesn’t notice. “We could go, if you want.” Hongbin doesn’t know if that would go well; Taekwoon has never invited him to his place before. Would it be okay for him to go uninvited?

Wonsik’s phone rings. After checking it, he gets up and offers his hand to Hongbin. He’s not moving though, still chewing the same slice of fruit; his breakfast almost untouched. The taller boy sighs and crouches in front of him. “Binnie, you already know what you want to do right?” Hongbin looks at him, unsure; Wonsik pats his head affectionately, messing up his hair. “Try to eat something. I’ve got practice at five; I’ll take you there on my way okay? It’ll be fine, don’t worry.”

-·-·-·-·-·-

“Taek-ah, honey… A friend of yours came to visit.”

The boy hears his mom talk with someone and walk down the stairs. He knows that Hakyeon isn’t in the city right now, but… Who else would come?

“Taekwoon-hyung? It’s me…” He knows all too well that voice. _Fuck._ “Can I-” Taekwoon moves without thinking, and holds the door closed. _No, no nonono. Not him. Please, anyone but him._ He doesn’t want Hongbin to see him like this. “Okay… Okay.” The boy isn’t ready for the sudden relieve he experiences, and it makes him hate himself. He waits for an answer, for Hongbin’s hurt, or his anger, he doesn’t know. And he waits for him to leave.

Instead, he hears Hongbin sitting at the other side of the door. And he starts talking. Taekwoon doesn’t understand it at first; his words come muffled through the door. But it doesn’t really matter. The cadence of his voice is relaxing; Taekwoon can almost imagine his hands moving in the air along with it.

Time goes by, Hongbin continues to talk, Taekwoon continues to listen. It seems like the boy is running out of voice, because he can barely hear him anymore. Taekwoon wants to listen. He reaches the door handle and opens, just a little bit. He knows Hongbin has noticed when he stops talking.

That’s also when Taekwoon notices how much time has passed. It’s dark outside; he’d say, at least 8 pm. Having his room in complete darkness really took the perspective of time away… Then Hongbin speaks again. “Hyung?” “It’s… late” he says. His voice is hoarse from not using it in days. “you should go home.” Hongbin’s hand appears, holding in the doorframe. “Can I… see you?” Taekwoon doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t know what to do; what he wants.

The hand retreats; Taekwoon swears he hears Hongbin getting up, and the word comes out of his mouth without thinking. “W-wait!” He hesitates. “Come.” The hand comes back, this time followed by the other one. Hongbin looks into the room, and Taekwoon is tries so hard to convince himself that this isn’t a bad idea. He still backs away when the boy first moves into the room; he wonders what will the other say when he sees him in that pathetic state.

But Hongbin surprises him yet again. Because he’s crawling in with his eyes closed. Once he’s inside, he closes the door, and the darkness surrounds him again. The light continues turned off, though. Taekwoon doesn’t get it. What is Hongbin doing? “Is this… Okay?” he first hears his voice, and then, his hands. Taekwoon first feels them brushing his knees, that he has pulled up to his chest. They continue wandering, over his arms, his shoulders… Taekwoon holds one of them and presses it to his cheek; it’s warm, and soft. “I- I’m sorry.” he chokes out. Hongbin presses his forehead against his, rubbing circles in his arm with his other hand. “It’s fine. It’s all fine.”

Taekwoon wants to protest; he wants to tell him, that this isn’t fine; nothing is. He wants to explain to him just how fucked up this. He is. That there are so many things he wishes to change, to erase. That he doesn’t deserve this, his warmth, his friendship. Him. But Hongbin continues to whisper sweet nothings, and his hands are tracing patterns in his skin, and his fingers are caressing his hair… There’s so much Taekwoon wants to say, but instead, he cries.

 

~·~·~·~·~·~EPILOGUE~·~·~·~·~·~

 

Taekwoon is waiting in front of his old school, and he feels quite nervous. There’s a lot of people here, will he be able to find him? He gulps down his raising anxiety, _it’s fine…_ But he doesn’t quite believe it until Hongbin appears between the sea of bodies. It takes almost no time for the boy to find him; shock evident in his face. “Hyung! What- You look great!” The boy had almost forgotten the other hadn’t seen him with his new, blond hairstyle yet; he himself hasn’t gotten used to it. Taekwoon can feel the blush growing on his face.

“How did you make it here? I thought you’d be… busy.” “You said some of your pictures from the photography club would be exposed in the festival… I came to see them. And your brother is performing too, right?” It brings the most blinding smile to the boy’s face. “Yeah! Sik-hyung worked really hard…!”

Hongbin is eager to take him inside; he talks excitedly about all the booths and activities the different classes have prepared. Taekwoon can barely keep up with what he says, and it takes him a second to realise that the boy has stopped talking; he’s been asked something. “Where do you want to go first?” “Uh… and you?” Taekwoon doesn’t want to admit he wasn’t actually listening; he got too distracted by his expressions and cute gestures.

Hongbin considers the question. And he must have come up with just the right place because his eyes suddenly shine like tiny universes full of stars. “I know! Come on!” He offers his hand. As always, offering, giving, reaching out. Taekwoon takes it, holds it tight. “Okay.”

Without a previous warning, Hongbin pulls his phone from his pocket and snaps a pic of Taekwoon. “What?” “Nothing…” the boy turns bashful, and averts his eyes. “You had a nice expression.” “But I didn’t… What expression?” Hongbin smiles.

“A smile. A happy one.”


End file.
